Hiring Managers Women Lack the Capacity for Logic and Reason - Work It Daily

Recruiting Managers Women Lack the Capacity for Logic and Reason - Work It Daily I am a Ph.D. For near 25 years I have been leading observational research on ladies in the work environment. My decision is authoritative: Women come up short on the limit with respect to rationale and reason. It is basic for employing supervisors to remember this reality when settling on recruiting choices. Try not to do it! On the off chance that you punch the screen and break it you will void the guarantee. It won't be unreasonably incredible for your hand either! No! That won't be any better. Tossing the screen out the window will break the window and the glass and screen will hit the ground. In the event that they land on somebody you will be dependable. Take a full breath. Have a taste of water. Presently keep perusing. How about we expect since you are here you trust CAREEREALISM.com is a genuine site with esteem. How about we likewise expect on the off chance that they distributed this article, and Affirmed me as a Lifelong Expert, they should think I hear what I'm saying. In addition, I said I have a Ph.D! So I should hear what I'm saying. All things considered, I directed exact research. Impressive, ain't it? Alright. At this point you have made sense of I am not a total nitwit â€" despite the fact that I can give a rundown of individuals who will contend with you. So how about we take a gander at what I did. I built up my accreditations. I referenced I have a propelled degree and I am composing on a dependable site. Thing is, my Ph.D. is in International Relations. As it were, to summarize from Gone with the Wind, I don't know nothin' 'session science or chromosomes. (Men are more astute than ladies since we have a Y chromosome and they don't. We're reasonable and intelligent; they're passionate and… well, you get the thought.) And what does 25 years of experimental research mean? I've been working with ladies for a long time (all the more truly) and have watched and communicated with them. At the end of the day, what I composed is jabber and I have no power to state anything of the sort. It's total trash. My preferred plugs were for Budweiser â€" and no, notwithstanding what you may figure, I don't drink. Recall the frogs? I wish they would bring them back. In the last business one of the animals took a gander at the camera and stated, What does any of this have to do with brew? So you are presumably soliciting, What does any of this have to do with vocation advising or employing? Unfortunately, a ton. Here's my concern. (Be decent. I previously said the starting was babble and trash!) I can't utilize names since I would prefer not to get the proprietors of CAREEREALISM in legitimate boiling water and, normally, I would prefer not to push myself into difficulty either. So overlook the subtleties and think about the master plan: I have a radio show, Bruce Hurwitz Presents. At regular intervals I search for visitors on different points. At the present time, in all honesty, I am doing a progression of shows on Women Entrepreneurs. However, I additionally welcome individuals to try out any thoughts they may have. There are some intriguing individuals out there. (Don't hesitate to send me a pitch. The email is bh@hsstaffing.com. Try not to be offended in the event that I dismiss it. There are just such a large number of days in seven days.) For any situation, as of late I have been accepting pitches from individuals introducing as Ph.D.s. I've likewise gotten a couple of resumes from Ph.D.s. How about we take the principal associate first: Ph.D.s sending in pitches. They have sites. I visited their locales. Great. They have their profiles. In a few cases they notice where they got their doctorates; in a couple they didn't. Primary concern, something simply didn't feel right. A little research and I found their doctorates were from unaccredited colleges. Same thing for the subsequent companion: continue submitters. Something simply didn't feel right. A basic Google search uncovered reality. Degrees from unaccredited schools or colleges. I called a couple. They didn't contend. They knew it. They were not defrauded. They got captured and acknowledged there was no reason for belligerence. An unaccredited degree is useless, yet they are likewise risky. In one case the individual introduced as a wellbeing master. She really claims to be a looked for after speaker and offers guidance on medical problems. That is hazardous. Individuals anticipate that her should have genuine training. She doesn't. They don't have any acquaintance with it. Admonition emptor. Allow the purchaser to be careful! (Why occasion coordinators wouldn't check a speaker's certifications is past me… ) So the purpose of the entirety of this is to underscore to employing chiefs today, maybe due to the economy, individuals are attempting to take the simple and modest way out and purchase degrees. Furthermore, for up-and-comers, you will get captured. In the event that I can discover the cheats, anybody can. What's more, in the event that you are gotten after you are employed, you will more than likely be terminated in light of the fact that, if a degree is required for the position you were recruited to fill, you don't have it! Besides, regardless of whether the degree is unimportant, who needs to recruit a cheat or make them work for them? (P.S. I commit this article to my companions Betty and Yael.) Bruce A. Hurwitz, Ph.D., President and CEO of Hurwitz Strategic Staffing, Ltd., has been an official spotter and profession advisor since 2003. CAREEREALISM clients are qualified at a half-cost rebate on his Udemy.com course, How to Conduct an Effective Job Search. When incited enter Coupon Code CR201101. Peruse more » articles by this affirmed profession master | Click here » in case you're a lifelong master Picture from alexmillos/Shutterstock Have you joined our vocation development club?Join Us Today!

Final year exams survival guide

Last year tests survival reference Last year tests endurance guidePosted October 13, 2011, by Darryn King Every year, Year 12 understudies around Australia sit their last year tests. Here are a few hints, not for contemplating, yet for adapting to the various things that test time brings. Feed your cerebrum Be particularly cautious picking what to eat before a test. Fuelling yourself with sugar and caffeine may seem like a smart thought, until you descend from your high partially through the test and are abruptly incapable to think. Moreover, its likely not a smart thought to pig out yourself preceding going into the test room chances are youll feel enlarged and somewhat lethargic. Rather, keep yourself all around took care of with normal, adjusted suppers and solid tidbits. Dont overlook your jug of water particularly to ward off those dreadful cerebral pains. Furthermore, dont ever, EVER skip breakfast. Get physical Another significant piece of keeping solid is to ensure you dont coop yourself up inside throughout t he day. Regardless of whether you have a great deal of concentrating to do, infrequent physical exercise regardless of whether it is simply taking a stroll outside once in a while is a decent method to loosen up and very important to keep normal. Getting some daylight (and some Vitamin D) is significant for your wellbeing and prosperity as well. Loner or social creature? Things being what they are, would it be advisable for you to quit accepting calls, erase your Internet informing programs and shut yourself off from your companions? Or on the other hand would it be a good idea for you to stay in touch to ease the fatigue and stay in contact with the real world? In the event that youre on your investigations, you may end up with more available time than you were envisioning. Everyones unique, so youll need to locate a sound harmony among mingling and study that works for you. Its likewise essential to not promptly toss your nose back on the grindstone after a major test reward yours elf with a break! Rest and unwinding The average Year 12 understudy ought to get around eight hours rest a night. You have to stroll into that test room feeling refreshed and wakeful, not depleted and exhausted. Pulling dusk 'til dawn affairs and remaining conscious for 31 hours isn't the approach. Likewise, ensure you hit the sack at a sensible hour disturbing your rest cycle or playing with your circadian rhythms will be awful news for your forces of focus. You fundamentally need to know when nothing more will be tolerated. Set aside breaks and some effort to unwind however be careful about the mind desensitizing forces of TV! Take a stab at perusing a book or tuning in to music. Its not the apocalypse Calm down! Its not the apocalypse, regardless of whether you dont get the imprints you got ready for. In the event that youre going crazy a lot over the tests, odds are youll be worried in the test room, which is definitely not gainful. ResourcesMy first resumeCover letter for my fi rst jobCareer Insider StoriesShelley Lask - Body Positive Health and FitnessInterested in turning out to be a?Human Resources OfficerGeneral ManagerBusiness ManagerAccountantOffice AdministratorPopular Career Searches11 top tips for viable time managementtips for first year college studentsbest professions for the following ten yearswork experience thoughts year 12year 10 work experience sydney CoursesBachelor of Social WorkEnquire Online Enquire OnlineCertificate III in Health AdministrationEnquire Online Enquire OnlineBachelor of Criminal JusticeEnquire Online Enquire OnlineCertificate III in Allied Health AssistanceEnquire Online Enquire OnlineDarryn KingRelated ArticlesBrowse moreAgricultureEducationFive enterprises with the most brilliant futuresWish you could investigate a gem ball and discover where to take your vocation? We put a focus on national abilities deficiencies to bring you five enterprises that are tipped to experience noteworthy development well into the future.Ca reer progressionJob ad tipsDrop Everything And Read This Guide To Personal BrandingA solid individual brand is the way to individual and expert achievement. Here's the reason - alongside 9 incredible tips to make your own exceptional brand.Work/life balance12 Signs You're A WorkaholicAdmitting you're a work junkie isn't simple. Here are 12 signs to wake up you from disavowal and assist you with rolling out an improvement!

How To Job Search While Youre Still Employed - Work It Daily

The most effective method to Job Search While You're Still Employed - Work It Daily Searching for another activity could be troublesome, particularly when you're now utilized. You need to make additional opportunity to search for work - an undertaking that is difficult to pull off following an eight hour move. You additionally need to continue with alert in light of the fact that while you're hoping to change your vocation, you at the same time risk losing your present place of employment. Watch: How To Job Search While You're Employed Things being what they are, how might you quest for new employment while you're despite everything utilized? Use Discretion In case you're searching for an alternate activity, you shouldn't tell your associates, regardless of whether you're close with them. In a meeting with Forbes, corporate veteran Andy Teach, expresses that if your supervisor discovers you are searching for another activity, they may take the news adversely and imagine that you are not fulfilled in your ebb and flow position. The most dire outcome imaginable is that they may begin searching for a substitution, and you certainly don't need that to occur, particularly on the off chance that you haven't made sure about other business. Try not to Get Distracted Searching for another activity resembles another activity in itself. As indicated by an article distributed on profession guidance site, The Ladders, you need to make every day, week by week, and month to month notes of your pursuit of employment exercises. Note openings, contacts and associations you have to catch up with and plan when you ought to do it, expresses the article. Paying attention to your pursuit of employment requires a great deal of your time. Be that as it may, concentrating on your pursuit of employment an excessive amount of when you're utilized, could occupy you from your present proficient assignments. Keep in mind, you don't have a new position yet and in light of the fact that you're hoping to change employments doesn't mean you should disregard your present position. Utilize Your Free Time Regardless of whether it's thirty minutes, 60 minutes, or not as much as that, utilizing any extra time you need to search for another activity is an astute activity. In an article via vocation blogger and writer, Alison Green, it's anything but a smart thought to utilize your manager's a great opportunity to search for business. You may think nobody will discover, however a few organizations do see representatives' web accounts, and having yours brimming with work postings is anything but a smart thought, expresses the article. Organize your extra time for your pursuit of employment outside of work or in any event, during your mid-day break. On the off chance that you have any get-away time set aside, you could generally take a portion of that downtime for your pursuit of employment also. Whenever is superior to no time. In this way, in case you're searching for work when you're utilized, making sure to keep your pursuit of employment calm, maintain a strategic distance from interruptions, and utilize your leisure time are acceptable approaches to effectively and morally discover business. Related Posts 6 Ways To Secure A New Job Fathers: 7 Questions To Ask Before Taking The Job Step by step instructions to Avoid The Underemployment Trap Photograph Credit: Shutterstock Have you joined our profession development club?Join Us Today!

LinkedIn Videos update 4 new videos on writing Posts (aka, articles)

LinkedIn Videos update 4 new videos on writing Posts (aka, articles) I just sent the message below to members of my JibberJobber group on LinkedIn.  If you are not a member, click here to join.  (this is slightly edited for this blog post) Today I finished creating and editing four new videos to help you understand the (fairly) new Posts feature in LinkedIn. This used to be the influencer privilege, which very few people had access to. I think everyone has the feature now, though. hence the addition to the LinkedIn for Job Seekers streaming video series.These four videos are a part of the LinkedIn for Job Seekers Fourth Edition series if you have any questions about LinkedIn, go to this page and see what the videos.  The new video clips are: Posts: Introduction (and writing your first post) Posts: Rich text and formatting to your articles Posts: Two important tips to have better articles Posts: Conclusion and wrap-up If you have a request for additional videos for this series, let me know. The series is priced at $50. To get access, first get a JibberJobber account, then go here, and youll be able to purchase the streaming version. If you want $11 off, get the one year upgrade on JibberJobber (only $60), and then add the LinkedIn videos for only $39 more. IF YOU ARE A COACH, work in outplacement, or at a career center, and you are licensing this series already, your clients should have access to them. (if you, or they, have problems, refer them to the Contact Us page, or to Liz) If you want information on bulk purchasing, and you are a coach, resume writer, in outplacement, a recruiter, etc, please use the Contact form to ask for more information. Thank you, and have a great day! Jason Alba CEO www.JibberJobber.com Author Im on LinkedIn Now What??? Let us know if you have any questions! LinkedIn Videos update 4 new videos on writing Posts (aka, articles) I just sent the message below to members of my JibberJobber group on LinkedIn.  If you are not a member, click here to join.  (this is slightly edited for this blog post) Today I finished creating and editing four new videos to help you understand the (fairly) new Posts feature in LinkedIn. This used to be the influencer privilege, which very few people had access to. I think everyone has the feature now, though. hence the addition to the LinkedIn for Job Seekers streaming video series.These four videos are a part of the LinkedIn for Job Seekers Fourth Edition series if you have any questions about LinkedIn, go to this page and see what the videos.  The new video clips are: Posts: Introduction (and writing your first post) Posts: Rich text and formatting to your articles Posts: Two important tips to have better articles Posts: Conclusion and wrap-up If you have a request for additional videos for this series, let me know. The series is priced at $50. To get access, first get a JibberJobber account, then go here, and youll be able to purchase the streaming version. If you want $11 off, get the one year upgrade on JibberJobber (only $60), and then add the LinkedIn videos for only $39 more. IF YOU ARE A COACH, work in outplacement, or at a career center, and you are licensing this series already, your clients should have access to them. (if you, or they, have problems, refer them to the Contact Us page, or to Liz) If you want information on bulk purchasing, and you are a coach, resume writer, in outplacement, a recruiter, etc, please use the Contact form to ask for more information. Thank you, and have a great day! Jason Alba CEO www.JibberJobber.com Author Im on LinkedIn Now What??? Let us know if you have any questions!

A Melodic Review of a Recruitment Bygone Year

A Melodic Review of a Recruitment Bygone Year It’s the most wonderful time of the year… I find it is a great opportunity to reflect on all aspects of your recruitment year just passed: • The successes and achievements • The failures and learning curves made from them • Your sales/revenue achieved, versus targets • Clients gained and lost reasons why Oh Come all ye faithful Taking each of those points- successes and achievements clearly include strong billing, biggest fees and incredible candidates placed. Think about what you have overcome in a process. Some of my biggest successes this year has been placing really key people into entrepreneurial owner managed businesses, who have very quickly become such an important part of the fabric of that business that it feels like poetry. I can think of at least a dozen senior placements this year who have since become senior decision makers I have gone on to place with. That is the true recruitment life cycle in my opinion where candidate and client become one as your customer. Practise what you preach and faithfully work the winning formula each time, if you can! Stop the Cavalry The failures in recruitment are usually epitomised by candidates not getting the offers they had hoped for, for clients being disappointed by their ideal candidates being counter offered. All these are situations that every recruiter, nay employer, faces at some time. And the key point to note is that lessons are learned. What could have been done to avoid these failures? Better understanding at the start of the process of salary expectations and informing the client of this? Probing the motivations of the candidate’s desire to move to anticipate the counter offer? Teaching you to suck eggs is not the purpose of my blogs, I promise, however, sometimes you need to STOP and go back to basics and ensure you learn from each process that did not result in success. My own personal “failures” this year have included the above scenarios and being in R2R, it may surprise you to read that this does happen- it shocks me when it does as my candidate/client management is something I pride myself on however I still take stock when these rare occurrences happen and ensure I learn with the other “wounded” party in what we could have done differently. Fairytale of New York So you/your boss/employer set a financial target at the start of the year. Hopefully you use key ratios as kpis to work backwards from there. With monthly appraisals and reviews weekly of your progress and with MOST markets in full recovery, most recruiters should be achieving consistent performances now if these targets set were realistic and fair. I have overachieved on my financial target by 50% this year. Which I am obviously delighted about. However, you will be shocked to hear that when I hit my yearly goal by July, I did not sit back on my laurels, I kept on pushing and doing the good bits and focused on over achieving. This is the fairytale part where you know every solid placement you make is profit and a true delight! KPIs are not there to bash people over the head with. I measure myself on ratios. I achieved placement ratios of 1:1.7 which I know is exceptional, I am a “sniper” in how I operate though, working mainly with exclusive highly experienced people and clearly working SMARTLY with them rather than a “scatter gun” approach. My trade secrets revealed…. My Christmas present to you…. Last Christmas Mr Retrospective negotiator, unethical/immoral client/candidate, I gave you my heart but the very next day, you gave it away…. If you have clients who have shown they are not true partners, if they lack any integrity- renegotiating, going behind your back, as two prime examples: now is the time to draw the line and as you devise your strategic business plan for next year, do not partner these people going forward. Equally, which clients HAVE become true partners to you- even if you have not yet placed with them, focus on how you can build on this relationship next year; set key milestones, arrange to meet up f2f quarterly. This is a perfect time of year to reflect on what has worked and… what hasn’t. Recruitment is not a perfect science though as we all know, we are dealing with fellow human beings, so things change, circumstances alter- for either party involved; people change their minds! My Christmas wish for recruitment is for us all to remember that our moral obligation is to maintain integrity at all times, to be honest to all individuals- to show empathy and compassion. To offer the best customer experience that we can and ultimately, do unto others…. I will leave you with one my favourite Christmas songs of all time and rather apt for what is going on in the world at the moment…. Happy Xmas (War Is Over) I hope you have enjoyed the click throughs to the songs chosen above to put you all in a Christmas spirit, go and grab a Gluwhein, a mince pie and sit back and enjoy. Thank you this year for your likes, RT, shares, comments and support. I look forward to seeing you all in the New Year! Be safe. [Image Credit: Shutterstock]

2009 is the Year of the Niche Gatekeepers - Personal Branding Blog - Stand Out In Your Career

2009 is the Year of the Niche Gatekeepers - Personal Branding Blog - Stand Out In Your Career This year, I wrote an article called 5 Steps to Becoming the Gatekeeper of Your Personal Brand, and today Im telling you that you need to follow those steps immediately. In 2009, there will be new gatekeepers or those that own a niche on the web. Trying to own your own mainstream media news website is quite a lofty and ambitious goal, especially when youre competing with titans such as the Wall Street Journal and USA Today. Web 2.0 has allowed anyone to produce a media website, collect advertising revenues and build a strong readership based, which tends to be more loyal (RSS) than traditional readership. Its niche player time In 2009, online viewers will be very spread out among a lot of niche sites that cater to special interest groups. Some call this the long tail theory, and I think its only natural that people cling to their interests and sort out what blogs provide the most value (entertainment or informational). Weve already seen the rise of some gatekeepers, but they arent so much niche players anymore, as their industries have grown. Here are some common examples: I would consider each of these individuals career commanders and experts in personal branding. The best test for personal branding greatness is being top-of-mind. When I think of a certain topic, they came to mind. Lets see which of them monitor their personal brand online by setting a Google alert to their name and responding to this post. ?? Social media: Chris Brogan, Jeremiah Owyang, Rohit Bhargava Marketing: Seth Godin Personal Finance: J.D. Roth, Ramit Sethi Entrepreneurship: Guy Kawasaki, Pamela Slim Technology: Robert Scoble Celebrities: Perez Hilton Careers: Penelope Trunk, Lindsey Pollak, Alexandra Levit Recruiting: Joel Cheesman, Chris Russell Why gatekeepers succeed and you dont The more content these individuals create over a period of time, the more they will rank higher in Google and attract a larger audience. The value of their blog properties has increased over the years because theyve taken a leadership position and have written about ideas that have spread through the internet (aka more links). Google values websites that have been around for a while more than fresh sites. This means they have control over their subject areas and in order to be half as successful as they are with their blogs, you need to earn their respect (get a link from them from time to time). Otherwise, it will be extremely hard for you to succeed at their level because they own their domain. Since social media is much like high school, if you arent in the cool crowd, you wont get as many links and it will be much harder for you to escalate to the top. You can be a gatekeeper in 2009 In 2009, if you are new to the web, you have the ability to stand out and shine. If you are already a blogger, you may have to shift your strategy slightly. There are literally infinite niche’s out there that haven’t been claimed. One great way to do this is to conduct searches on Google for groups of keywords. Also, by following the hot trends, you might identify a great niche for yourself. Either way, you need to find a non-saturated area of the internet if you want to be found. First movers are always rewarded!

14 Essential Online Dating Tips For Women - Classy Career Girl

14 Essential Online Dating Tips For Women Online dating used to be something you whispered self-consciously to your closest friends, as if it meant you had “failed” at meeting someone the traditional way. Nowadays, more and more couples are meeting each other online and the rules are being rewritten. I’ve actually enjoyed my experiences online dating, and I’m on my fourth year anniversary with someone I met online.     The secret, I’ve found, is mainly in your attitude and approach to online dating. Here are some of my top tips, from one honest classy career girl to another! 14 Essential Online Dating Tips For Women 1. Be Confident Dont approach online dating submissively.  It’s scary to admit that you are “looking” for that special someone but don’t forget, your blind date is auditioning as much as you are.  If you walk into your date with a genuine desire to learn about the other person, have a pleasant conversation, and have an inner confidence of what you bring to the potential partnership, you will feel a lot more comfortable meeting strangers. Remember, they are probably just as nervous as you are. Don’t forget you want to assess if you like them. Don’t worry so much about them liking you and I promise you won’t feel as nervous. 2. Don’t Drag It Out I used to let guys send me several electronic messages back and forth before meeting up in person. Then I started realizing that many men are very eloquent online, but too shy or too socially awkward to really spark any chemistry in real life.  Once I got wise to this, I’d start to notice that the men who wrote super-long messages were often the ones most reluctant to meet me in person, as they knew that they weren’t bringing a lot of assets aside from their writing ability. Then I switched to making sure the messages were shorter and after just a few messages, I would initiate asking to meet for coffee. Not surprisingly, some never wrote back. Others agreed and we found out during the meeting that we didn’t have any chemistry.     Better to meet sooner rather than later so that the encounter doesn’t drag out and you waste time writing back and forth. Why would you invest time becoming emotionally attached to someone through their writing and words if you would never click once you meet in person? Establish an interest in each other and then don’t drag it out. Get that initial meeting over with as soon as you can. And, just as importantly, never continue dating someone after the first date because you “feel bad” for them.     If they persist, be honest and say, “I had a great time, but I don’t see us together romantically.”  You need to cut those strings loose immediately.  Nothing good can come of this situation, not to mention you’re now bringing in a drain on your time and energy. 3. Have a Sense of Humor   Attitude is everything. I kept a brief blog during two periods of online dating in two different states. It was the only way to keep everything in perspective and to keep my friends entertained. I would post the messages I would receive online (some of which led me to blocking the writers) or comment on weird dates I’d been on. Most notable: the guy who was obsessed with turtles, and the guy who wanted to talk about his nightmares. Here’s a tip: If a guy has to write “no crazies please” in his profile, you do not want to hang out with him since clearly he is a magnet for drama. You WILL go out on a weird date at least once, but probably more than once. That’s why I recommend coffee or something non-committal â€" you don’t want to be stuck at a dinner table! You need to prepare yourself for it now and instead of turning this into a pity-party (“Why do I always get the weirdos”) you need to change your attitude to, “I can’t wait to tell my friends about this!” 4. Know Yourself Before Demanding Attributes From Others Make sure you’re not asking for more than you’re willing to give. Are you writing that you want someone in a certain socioeconomic status, but in the same paragraph you demonstrate a lack of ambition and a lack of discipline?  It’s difficult to demand standards from others if you don’t have them for yourself. Don’t gleefully write “I’m a princess and you must open the door for me and you will take me out to a five-star restaurant on our first date,” and then wonder why confident men steer away from you.     The classiest thing a lady can do is simply expect high standards, not demand them.     It’s amazing how much this makes a difference in people’s opinion of you. Consider asking a trusted friend (perhaps even a male friend) to check your online profile and see if they can guess the type of person you’re trying to attract. If they can’t, you might want to consider rewriting your profile or changing your photos so that there isn’t a disconnect between what you think you’re saying and what you’re presenting to the world.   5. Never Lie On Your Profile Do not put up photos from 50 lbs ago. Do not say you don’t have any kids if you really do.  Do not gush that you love heavy metal when you really don’t. Do not say you like long walks in the park if you’re actually allergic to pollen.     Just don’t. 6. Recognize Online Dating is Hard for Both Men and Women On many sites, some women just have to put up one photo and they will receive 100 messages in one hour. This is mind-boggling.     Men have to work a little harder to be on the receiving end of pursuit.     Thus, men are dealing with online dating rejection every single day as the odds of their receiving a response are lower than yours. With 100 messages a day, how are you going to possibly sort through these? Your mind will eventually figure out shortcuts who put effort into their profile, who has a photo you like, who used humor in their profile or who seems confident. While at first it may feel flattering to get so many messages and “likes,” don’t let it go to your head. Stay authentic and true to your values and your character, and use the same clues in assessing their profile that you would if you met them in real life. 7. Recognize Setups If a guy reaches out to “tease” you or to challenge you (“I bet you’re the type of girl who would never…”), walk away right now. This is a huge red flag.  You do not have to prove anything to him.  Only a stranger with bad intentions would want to make you feel defensive or that you have to prove anything. If someone said this to your face, how would that make you feel?  Delete his message and move on.  Same with inappropriate or vulgar unwanted messages â€" don’t even bother responding with a reaction because that is what they are looking for. Block or report the person and focus on positive interactions. 8. View Online Dating as a Marathon, Not a Sprint Unless you get incredibly lucky, you’re not going to hit off with the first person you meet and live happily ever after. You need to be prepared for a series of interesting first dates before you find yourself moving on to that one special person. 9. Experiment With Different Dating Websites I’m not going to name the different dating websites as every generation seems to have a new app or favorite website, but just know that each site seems to have its individual culture in terms of demographics, emphasis on serious relationship, ways of interacting, and so forth. Don’t expect to have the same results with each website, you may have to experiment a bit. For instance, some are definitely a bit more marriage-oriented while others feature more casual encounters. Also, I online-dated in two different states (I changed jobs), and although I was using the same website I found the quality of men and the experience to be quite different on that same website. Give certain sites a second chance if you move to a new city, or ask your friends what they’ve used that they like.   10. Don’t Take Mismatches Personally Some women may come home after every coffee date and sulk on the couch.  â€œI’ll never meet anyone!” When you bring this attitude to the table, you bring negativity and bad energy to the process and you are also putting on a desperate vibe, which means you will not attract the best candidates.  Once you start complaining about your dates, you have begun to look at dating as a combative and negative experience which will affect your judgment. I’m telling it to you straight: Desperation is not attractive.     Be classy, acknowledge that not everyone has chemistry with each other, “bless and release,” and move on to the next date.   11. Take a Break During my first online dating foray, I thought I had it down.  Then I scheduled three coffee meetups…in the same day. This was as exhausting as it sounds. Looking back on it, this wasn’t the smartest move for an introvert anyway,  but having three different blind dates on the same day made me realize I wanted to take a step back and not be out there so much. Step back and take a break every so often â€" often you can temporarily disable your profile so that you don’t continue to get messages in your absence. 12. Be Safe I never let anyone pick me up at my house for a first date and I always told a friend when I was on a first date, even if it was just coffee.  The first time my now-boyfriend came over to my house, I texted my friend and asked her to check up on me in a few hours.  It’s just always good to let people know your whereabouts when you’re hanging out with strangers. 13. Be Honest About Your End Goal Be honest with yourself about what you’re looking for and make sure you’re using the appropriate website. Also, you need to make sure you know what type of man you are looking for.     Then, if his internet profile gives even the hint of something else to the contrary, do not contact him. I repeat, do not contact him. If you are looking for a significant relationship with someone who doesn’t drink, for example, do not reach out to someone who has a photo of them with a beer bottle in their hand, no matter how good looking they are.  You cannot change anyone and you are only setting yourself up for disappointment later. Many times when people complain about mismatches during their online dating adventures, you can generally discern that there were hints of a potential mismatch from the very beginning. 14. Keep an Open Mind Sometimes you have to recognize what is a “big rule” (the dealbreakers) and what is a “little rule” (you just trying to maintain control over a scary process). When I met my now-boyfriend, I actually broke most of my own smaller rules. I gave him my telephone number after one message online, met up late at night for our first date, and I kissed him on the first date. All things I’d refused to do for many other men who’d contacted me. Four years later, he is the most inspiring, supportive, motivated, and ambitious person I know.     Sometimes I even forget we met on the internet.     It’s fine to have ground rules as an emotional support, but as long as you’re safe and legal, don’t forget to follow your heart as well.   I wish you the best of adventures with your new online dating skills!